today.
well.
this is supposed to be a private blog so im not going to bother primping it up with ridiculously pinkifiedd templates from blogskins.com. though some can be really quite nce. but anyway.
i suppose one day someone will stumble upon this blog. just like everyone stumbles upon everyone else's private blogs. -shrugs-
it is my private blog. so no one has to come in if they so do not want to.
i find myself a little hard to comprehend. abit of myself here and another part of myself there. sometimes i do feel like im losing my own grasp on my life. just as it always is. and i dont understand why its like that. but... why am i not celebrating, but instead feeling weird and suspicious that i have no homework to be completed and handed up tomorrow - with the exception of SIAs that is.
i just. did that. write 10 things to 10 people thing on my public blog. but there's so much more i want to say to them. but. well. i never could. and i probably never would either.
i do suppose i'll express them out in bits and pieces as i go along. in here of course. i suppose saying it outside would just open myself to mmm. misunderstandings i suppose. and i could do very well avoiding those things now. yeah.
sometimes. i feel so confused and at a complete loss as to how i should deal with things. it feels so horrible sometimes. only being able to look on, and yet not being able to do anything that could help. i dont know what to do. honestly.
lynette. she's driving me in circles and i dont know how to deal with her. dont know how to help her. i know. i know she's not alright like she tends to tell others she is. not alright like she tries to show others she is. but then again. what can we all do really...? she keeps turning her back to all of us who try to help. i have no idea why. but. i dont know. she reminds me so greatly of adwyn. so many people willing to be there to help them. but yet. either they dont see it. or they simply refuse to accept and allow others into their lives. its. its so frustrating. sighs.
nevermind my angst.
this is supposed to be a private blog so im not going to bother primping it up with ridiculously pinkifiedd templates from blogskins.com. though some can be really quite nce. but anyway.
i suppose one day someone will stumble upon this blog. just like everyone stumbles upon everyone else's private blogs. -shrugs-
it is my private blog. so no one has to come in if they so do not want to.
i find myself a little hard to comprehend. abit of myself here and another part of myself there. sometimes i do feel like im losing my own grasp on my life. just as it always is. and i dont understand why its like that. but... why am i not celebrating, but instead feeling weird and suspicious that i have no homework to be completed and handed up tomorrow - with the exception of SIAs that is.
i just. did that. write 10 things to 10 people thing on my public blog. but there's so much more i want to say to them. but. well. i never could. and i probably never would either.
i do suppose i'll express them out in bits and pieces as i go along. in here of course. i suppose saying it outside would just open myself to mmm. misunderstandings i suppose. and i could do very well avoiding those things now. yeah.
sometimes. i feel so confused and at a complete loss as to how i should deal with things. it feels so horrible sometimes. only being able to look on, and yet not being able to do anything that could help. i dont know what to do. honestly.
lynette. she's driving me in circles and i dont know how to deal with her. dont know how to help her. i know. i know she's not alright like she tends to tell others she is. not alright like she tries to show others she is. but then again. what can we all do really...? she keeps turning her back to all of us who try to help. i have no idea why. but. i dont know. she reminds me so greatly of adwyn. so many people willing to be there to help them. but yet. either they dont see it. or they simply refuse to accept and allow others into their lives. its. its so frustrating. sighs.
nevermind my angst.
posted by huIshI at 10:24 PM
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